I might be that kind of woman
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Posted:Apr 3, 2019 3:32 am
Last Updated:Apr 14, 2019 6:43 am
10324 Views
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Most mornings I wake up with a song playing in my head. Today it is this one...
There once was a woman
A strange kind of woman
The kind that gets written down in history
Her name was Nancy
Her face was nothing fancy
She left a trail of happiness and misery
I loved her
Everybody loved her
She loved everyone and gave them good return
I tried to take her
I even tried to break her
She said I ain't for takin' won't you ever learn
I want you I need you I gotta be near you
I spent my money as I took my turn
I want you I need you gotta be near you
Ooh I got a strange kind of woman
She looked like a raver
But I could never please her
On Wednesday mornings boy you can't go far
I couldn't get her
But things got better, she said
Saturday nights from now on baby you're my star
She finally said she loved me
I wed her in a hurry
No more callers and I glowed with pride
I'm dreaming
I feel like screaming
I won my woman just before she died
I want you I need you I gotta be near you
I spent my money as I took my turn
I want you I need you I gotta be near you
Ooh I had a strange kind of woman
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Just a little Kiss
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Posted:Mar 31, 2019 6:47 pm
Last Updated:Apr 14, 2019 6:44 am
8651 Views
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Last night I had a "last chance" experience, I went to see the iconic rock band Kiss in concert. I'm not one who enjoys crowds, I actually kind of hate crowds, but I wasn't missing the end of the road tour. The energy in the arena was amazing. A sold out crowd of Kiss Army members. The show was phenonemal! Fireworks! Flames! Smoke! Lasers! Rockets shooting from a guitar! Some of the best known songs of my lifetime (still a lil pissed that they didnt do Uh! All Night, but hey, it was still great). Paul and Gene are pushing 70, but they are still amazing. They aren't messing around either. A 20 song set, no intermission, back to back performances around the world. They are strutting around in platform boots, singing and playing from their hearts. It was an amazing experience. I will admit I needed a longer recovery period than I did the last time I saw them, but I'm proud to say that I still wanna rock and roll until around 11PM, and party maybe once every 3 months or so.
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Nice Job Girls!
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Posted:Feb 9, 2019 3:45 pm
Last Updated:Apr 3, 2019 3:33 am
8315 Views
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"It's time your annual mammogram" is never a reminder a woman wants. I especially was dreading this one, because I failed the last one. Then I turned around and failed the first biopsy, and also came away with a hemorrhage and a spectacular hematoma. Luckily, I passed the lumpectomy. This time. Was different, this time the girls did me proud. Nothing suspicious showed up on the mammogram!
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So, what are you looking for?
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Posted:Feb 8, 2019 6:07 am
Last Updated:Feb 9, 2019 3:45 pm
7660 Views
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Has to be the most common question asked around here. "So, what are you looking for?" I wish I knew how to answer that. Ultimately, I am not "looking" for anything at all. It's easy to find what you search for. If I would say "I am for a 9 inch long, 4 inch in circumference penis, I probably would have found one years ago. The thing is, I am truly not looking for a damn thing. Every once in a great while, something just falls out of the clear blue sky and lands right in front of you. Those are the things to treasure or at least pursue. Maybe just poke it with a stick and see if it bites you. So, the bottom line is I am not here on a quest to find what I'm looking for, I am,just enjoying the experience and waiting for something I was not looking for to fall into my lap. I just hope it doesn't have a bony ass, I bruise easy.
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The great escape
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Posted:Sep 1, 2016 1:42 pm
Last Updated:Sep 3, 2016 8:05 pm
11685 Views
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I had to say goodbye to a dear old friend today. Due to finances, one of the all time best nursing home residents had to move to another home. You would think a 92 year old woman, weighing 82 pounds would pretty much go with the flow. Oh no. She put up one hell of a resistance. The aides came and found me, I talked her down a little, we made it to the door, and she revolted again. The medical transport driver asked if one of us would ride with her, everyone looked at me, I asked if I was allowed, the person in charge said yes, I said " let me grab my purse!" I sprinted to grab my stuff and ripped the door open and yelled "let's move it Ella, before they change their minds!" We got loaded into the van and started down the road. Ella was still not a happy camper, but she said she knew I wouldn't let anything bad happen to her. It was an interesting ride. She asked how many people we do this to, I asked what she meant, she said "how many people do you kidnap?" I replied "as many as we can talk into getting in the van." A little later she said "now you girls just drop me off at the next church we pass, the church takes homeless persons like me, you just drop me off and leave and I'll tell them 2 foreign men with funny accents took me, I don't want you girls getting in trouble over this." I distracted her by starting a rousing rendition of "cowboy sweetheart", she quickly joined in and was yodeling before long. Then she stopped and said "just let me out right here." I said "and then what?" She said "I'll walk, and when I can't walk anymore I'll just sit and cry on the side of the road." I explained that she was much better off just riding along with us. I asked if she wanted to drive, she replied "ah hell, I haven't driven in 10 years, I'm not sure I could." I said "I don't care, it's not my car, come on up here and give it a try." By the time we got to her new home she was cool with the whole idea. She sang and yodeled for the staff there and demanded lunch. When I was leaving I gave her a hug and kiss and told I loved her and I'm glad we'd gotten to be friends. I was fighting tears and then she said "I love you, lots, and when they find out I escaped from that last hell hole, I promise I won't tell them you were my accomplice." Well thanks Ella.
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Then they do
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Posted:Aug 24, 2016 8:30 pm
Last Updated:Apr 29, 2024 3:57 am
13911 Views
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grow up. In a hurry.
My youngest has decided he needs to wear stylish clothes. He's outgrown camp shorts and basic tshirts. He likes to shop in stores that sell jeans for the price I would pay for a complete outfit. Yesterday, he got the braces off his teeth and got a different haircut. He aged 5 years in 2 hours. He's a big . Literally, he's one of the 3 tallest 10th graders. He used to be the littlest in the grade. He's still full of mischief, he still gets the same impish look in his eye when he knows he's going to do something, and that something is going to land him in a spot of trouble, but it's going to be hilarious, so it's worth it. His spirit has grown with his body. I'm just hoping there's no more twerking in math class or "excessive mooing" (yes, he mooed excessively in 2nd grade, it's noted in his permanent record). He'll be better when he's older. I'm sure of it.
The middle has been off at college for 10 days. She moved in early because she's on a sports team. I just saw a picture of her and her teammates enjoying some downtime at the lake after running the trails there. She. Looks. Like. She's. 26. She was 18 when I dropped her off. She's beautiful. Rockin a bikini on her 6'0, athletic frame. Whatever happened to scabby kneed, sticky faced, filthy little girl who played in the creeks and woods, and bet her dad $10 she could milk a wild bunny? The girl who picked all the apples too soon to feed to her pretend horses. Oh, I know she's still in there, she's just changed shapes. She wants to play with the animals in the woods as a profession. She'll get there.
The oldest , dubbed "great mighty ruler" by the younger ones, has done the college thing, for awhile, she took some time off to "figure things out." I think we all know how that goes, they never go back. But that's ok, she stumbled into a job she loves, that pays well. And has the potential for moving up the ladder. She's back under my roof, but she's doing good. Paying her bills, saving a small fortune. She's up at 3 am some mornings. She gets shit done. She's a boss. In everything she does. Whether she's coaching her sister in sports, or tutoring her brother in algebra, or running a business for her boss. She's got this. Always has.
So, while its sad that they grow up so fucking fast, it's cool to see some of their traits grow with them. But dammit, where did the time go?
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It lingers
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Posted:Aug 13, 2016 2:24 am
Last Updated:Aug 24, 2016 8:02 pm
12559 Views
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I needed a night like this.
A few hours away, spent with one of the truest friends I've ever known.
There was talking and laughing and some really incredible orgasms.
As I lay in my bed now, watching the clock, thinking "if I fall asleep right now I can sleep for 39 minutes before the alarm goes off", I'm very aware of his scent on my skin, in my hair. I can't help but breath deeply, savoring it. It's not cologne. It's not the smell of soap, or sex even. It is the essence of him.
I remember the look in his eyes as we joined. I remember the sensation of his fingers stroking my side as we lay snuggled in for some pillow talk. I remember feeling more at peace with my crazy world, for too short a period of time.
I don't have to recall his scent, it is right here with me. Even though we are in different beds now, I hold a part of him here. It's warm and comforting, and it won't last long, so I'll treasure it while it lingers.
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4
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Paying it forward
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Posted:Aug 1, 2016 12:57 pm
Last Updated:Mar 23, 2019 4:46 pm
12475 Views
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As soon as I left work, my phone rang. It was the boy , he said "hi, how was your day? Were you busy? Anybody die? Yell at any coworkers? I'm really hungry could you get me some fries?" (All in one breath with no pauses) Now normally it's no big deal to stop and grab fries, but there is a war on right now. A legit war. Ok, not legit, it's kind of a pretend war. The Society of Creative Anachronism is holding the Pennsic War in my neighborhood. My community, which used to be terra icognito, has become the host site of all kinds of festivals, fairs, conventions, and other assorted ruckuses. For the next two weeks, my normally pastoral area is over run by the crazies. (A term coined by the locals to reference the SCA members who triple our township population each and every summer). Knights in shining armour, damsels in distress, jousters, trebuchets, and all other things common in pre 17th century life, stand between McDonalds and my home. So, being a quick thinking mom, I said "if you run up to the back 40 and and pick some beans, I will get you fries." He said "I swept the floors and brushed the dog, can I have a burger too?" I asked if he swept before or after he brushed, because if it was before, it was an exercise in futility. He said he brushed then swept, so I agreed to get a burger. Since he's a good , I decided to spring for an entire happy meal. I mean really, what doesn't like toys with the tiny box of fries? When I pulled ahead to the window, the cashier told me that the lady in front of me paid for my order. The happy meal is free! Now, I could have put the $3.74 back in my wallet and pulled away thinking I got totally free field labor out of a 15 year old who'd rather be playing some silly tank war game, but I said "then I would like to pay for the person behind me." I really should have looked in the mirror before offering. It was a family of about 8. Or perhaps it wasn't a family at all, maybe it was a mini van of who'd been kidnapped and were bein hauled to some port to be stuffed into a cargo box and shipped somewhere horrible, to be used as God knows what. Naw, they all looked too happy to be in the midst of some trafficking scheme. They were also very hungry. Instead of paying $3.74 for a happy meal, I paid $32.86, for a bunch of happy meals. I did it with a smile, knowing that all things come full circle. You get what you sow. For out on the edge of darkness, there runs the peace train. We all shine on. Amazing grace. Kumbaya. And so on. So I pull out of McDonald's and brace myself to run the gauntlet through the middle of the Pennsic War. Alas and alack, the siesta was big in the 17th century, or perhaps the king said "oh holy hell its like the fires of hades, my breechclout is soaked from my swampy ass, fuck this armor and fuck this war, let us go skinny dipping!" I saw nary a knight nor even one damsel. No halberds smashed through my windshield. It was a nice trip home. The boy was happy, I felt good about paying it forward, and there was peace in the kingdom of the crazies.
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Party planning
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Posted:Jul 25, 2016 3:37 pm
Last Updated:Mar 26, 2019 7:21 pm
12877 Views
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In the interest of blog diversity, I'm going to share how to have the easiest party ever. The secret is, a taco bar. My suggested having one at her graduation party. My first thought was "a taco bar??? Will people like that???" Then she went on to say she'd like to have it at our house. My thoughts were "OMG, no..... Parking?? ....Who's cleaning for this? ... What if it rains???" Then I thought back to the oldest's grad party, all the cooking, the disappointment over some of the catered dishes, hauling everything to the park, hauling everything back home. The used condom found under a picnic table when we arrived to set up. I quickly decided that tacos at our house was the way to go. We made the guest list and menu, which was tacos, chips with salsa and queso, cake, and little fancy donuts. I made shopping lists, handed them off to the big in the house and sent them shopping. All I had to do was make the queso, brown the meat, and throw everything on the table. It was stress free, easy set up, easy cleanup. I could actually sit and enjoy the party. Since I was involved in this, and nothing ever quite goes as planned in my life, a sudden, severe thunderstorm blew through 30 minutes the scheduled start time. eventually it cleared and I was able to chase people out of the house and into the yard. Everyone had a great time, they loved the idea of being able to build their dinner their way, it was fantastic.
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So darling, why pretend...
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Posted:Jul 20, 2016 5:19 am
Last Updated:Oct 9, 2018 5:16 pm
12117 Views
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Anyone else ever walk into a place and feel a secret? It's creepy.
You know something has happened here.
Oh sure, it could be the negative pressure in my ear from my sinus infection, but my spidey sense is going nuts.
As soon as I walked in the door I heard the drums from that old Frida song, "there's something going on."
I don't care what goes on in this place, it's none of my business. I just hate picking up residual stuff. Warnings are nice.
I'm off to finish what I came here to do, I'll be singing along with Frida as I do it.
Next time, I'm bringing sage with me.
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Oh what a week
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Posted:Jul 8, 2016 10:24 am
Last Updated:Jul 12, 2016 7:51 pm
13207 Views
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Ever just reach the brink? Then do something stupid? I hope I'm not the only one.
I quit my job on Tuesday. Over cake crumbs left on a table through 3 shifts, and an orange juice spill that was left for a few hours. Yep. I cleaned it up, punched out, went off on the people who should have cleaned it, and drove my happy house home. My only regret was that I didn't punch one of them. Now, in reality, I didn't quit over the actual mess. I quit because of the lack of work ethic, and mostly the lack of respect of the coworkers who left it. We work in the home of the elderly, they live there, they pay the bills, if it weren't for them we wouldn't have jobs. That's the bottom line. The residents would never expect guests to eat a meal at a dirty table. We should offer them that same respect and courtesy. Luckily, my boss gets where my blow up came from. I'm an Empath, she's a Clairvoyant, we "get" each other. We had a nice talk, she said she needs me there, my job duties allow me to really keep a feel for what's going on around the place and she appreciates that I'll spout off when it's needed. I'm also the only one willing to bounce between 4 positions as needed. She assured that her promise of providing an alibi and bail money if I need it for defending the residents still stands if I'll just consider this a leave, not a permanent resignation. So, I'll be driving my happy ass back to work in a couple weeks.
So, I'm on vacation. What to do with myself? I worked out a business arrangement with a friend to do some cleaning. Now I think we all know that "clean" has a different definition based on gender. I'm also in purify, ground, and recharge mode in my life in general. Out with the negative, in with the positive. I'm diffusing oils, thymus thumping, hugging trees, wading in water, trying to get rid of my "dirt." I'm "detoxing" my mind, spirit and environment, because let's face it, balanced, grounded people don't lose their shit over cake crumbs and OJ. He's willing to turn me loose in his bachelor pad. Hot damn! It was glorious! I got to spend hours "purifying" that house, and with every swipe of the sponge or the dust rag, I felt a little purer myself. (I'm still accepting cleaning help as mentioned in my profile, it's different when it's someone else's impurity. Plus, it was a cash job.)
Today, I have a much clearer mind and spirit, but my body is reminding me how old it is. Perhaps I should have broken the maid duties up over a few days. I'll survive. Most likely. The tricky part is that I still have loaner dogs here. Big ones. Great dogs, but not as well trained as my dog. My knows that she sits at doorways and the top of the stairs and waits until you pat your leg, then she bounds through. These other two 90 pounders think they can walk beside you everywhere you go. This makes stairs treacherous, even when you're not feeble. One of the dogs is terrified to walk on my laminate floors. We've had to lay down a path of blankets, rugs and towels so that he can frolic and play the scaredy cat way. It's working great for the dog, but I'm most likely going to kill myself by slipping on a rug.
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I was so proud
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Posted:Jun 28, 2016 5:29 pm
Last Updated:Jun 28, 2016 7:47 pm
13120 Views
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My , sometimes they make my heart swell with pride. Tonight at dinner we were talking about which country to move to since this election isn't going to end favorably. I was impressed that they new which countries had which government type, which counties have strong militaries. Climates and growing seasons came up. Only the adult giggled when Australia's history as a penal colony came. I said "penal, not penile, look it up." They know their world geography. The discussion moved to how people become leaders, names like Lee, Patton, Hitler, and Manson came up. They talked about how easy it is to convince people who aren't free thinkers. Mr. wonderful pointed out that they are free thinkers, obstinate, belligerent, opinionated, stubborn, mouthy, crude, free thinkers. I said yes, this means we don't have to worry about peer pressure and we'll probably never have to kidnap them back from a cult. Tonight's topics were pretty deep, even the youngest (age 15) was contributing intelligently. It was a proud mom moment. One of those moments when I was pretty sure they're going to make it in this world. They won't end up living in a box.
Even as I was still basking in this contentment, things changed. We began clearing the table and doing dishes and the conversation turned to competitive midget tossing, and how it's only fair that the midget gets a chance to toss the person that tossed them first, and if you toss a midget into a lake does it go "splash" or "plop" like dropping a pebble in a puddle? Then the middle said she was going to try to learn to play the harmonica with the vacuum cleaner.
For a brief moment, I was so proud.
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Punctuation matters
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Posted:Jun 22, 2016 7:23 pm
Last Updated:Feb 8, 2019 6:10 am
12879 Views
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I give up wine everyday for a month.
Isn't the same as
I give up! Wine, everyday for a month!
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