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What is a Gentleman and What is He Worth?
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What is a Gentleman and What is He Worth? The history of what it means to be a gentleman is hundreds of years old and has evolved from it's beginnings as an aristocratic title automatically bestowed on the wealthy for no other reason than being wealthy. A gentleman was looked up to and respected by all for the gentleman qualities of the time. But times have changed and I'm not so sure that holds true anymore for a lot of people, especially some women. How often have you heard a woman lament the lack of gentleman these days or the proverbial nice guy? There are none out there she says. She'd love to have a good guy. And yet, when they find such a gentleman who treats them with kindness and respect, some women can't help themselves but to lose him. They can't seem to handle what they say they really want.They don't know how to deal with it. They'd rather be without or with the 'bad boy', who always turns out to be an A-hole or an abuser or cheater etc. I'd like to hear the conversation in her head...' Ok on the one hand there's : being treated well, respected, shown kindness, being loved..and on this hand there's : drama, being cheated on, lied to, disrespected, abused..Umm, yeah, I'm going with abuser.' You just gotta shake your head. I've been called a gentleman many times. To me, a gentleman means being respectful, courteous, reliable, kind, empathetic, helpful, dependable, considerate, etc. In other words, a nice guy. I can't help but be that. I am who I am. But a part of me cringes whenever I hear I am being referred to as a gentleman. It's the equivalent of the friend zone. Why is that? Precisely the reasons mentioned above. The women I have been in relationships with didn't realize what they had. Most likely had no idea what they wanted or what they thought they wanted. And so they fucked it up by being dishonest with their feelings, by being inconsiderate, disrespectful etc. I've been screwed over in numerous ways by women despite being the gentleman/nice guy. It's almost like gentleman=doormat. So that's why I cringe. Being a gentleman or a nice guy has done me no favors other than put a big bull's eye on my forehead. I could try being an A-hole but that's not being me (besides, I wouldn't look good with a pucker ring on my forehead). So, what's being a gentleman worth? To me, not much, because the aggravation and heartbreak isn't worth it, in my experience. For me, the saying 'nice guys finish last' is only too true. |
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