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| Blogs > whoisagentj > The Dossier of Agent J |
Get your shit together people!
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Get your shit together people! Ok, so that title might make it look like I'm mad at the people who are reading this...and...you would be wrong. I'm not. But man, I didn't realize how bad my parent's financial situation was until recently. But first a bit of backstory here... When my Dad's Grandparents were living in Arizona, they moved out there to get away from the family and live their lives. The only problem...they developed Alzheimer's. When my dad was trying to get them into a senior home to have themselves taken care of, my dad questioned my grandfather and asked him about his and his will, in order get things straightened out in the event of his death. My grandfather, so greatly affected by this, told my father he had no . So what happened, he had no other option but turn my parents over and wards of the state in Arizona, and they were taken into a home to be cared for. There was only one problem with this...because my grandfather's Alzheimer's was so bad, he didn't know that he had 200k in the ban So...the state seized all of the of my grandparents. And no one in our family got a dime of the . That could have been used help our family provide for them the care they needed. Instead, no one in the family got a dime, and the state took everything. My entire family on my father's side felt betrayed. And we got nothing, with the exception of a few momento's and pictures that my father at least had the presence of mind to take ahead of time, otherwise those would have been gone as well. It's not that my dad wanted the . But when my dad questioned him, my grandfather went into hysterics, saying that's all he cared about, when that was the furthest thing from his mind. He just wanted the best for his dad in his final years. Instead, my grandfather, fueled by fear his family would take everything away from him, neglected to tell anyone in the family about the amount of they had. Fast forward now. Now my dad is getting older. I can start see his memory is starting get bad, like my grandfather before him. And his situation is not good. So I questioned my dad about his finances and his will and where can we find his documents in case he passes, he just told me not to worry about it. Well, I could see history repeating itself. At least I learned the lessons my dad and mom are wanting to ignore. So my sisters and I took a look at his will's and his finances. And it shocked us to the core. He's nearly broke and living off of social security with a small insurance policy and barely anything but the house he has. He's pretty much house poor is what to call it. All he has is some stock, his house, and a mountain of debt, and his so called will for him and my mom, the will isn't even legal. Once again...the cycle has been passed from grandfather to father, and from father to . And my mother....she's oblivious to everything and she lives in a fantasy land, refusing to accept anything, thinking everything is ok when it's not. The only saving grace to this is...had my father not had his stroke episode a couple weeks ago, and we had not had a family meeting in order to deal with this, we would have never known. What's worse, the will would not have been legal, and if one of them had died, the estate would have gone to the other. But if both of them had died, 1/3rd of the estate would have gone to the government and their estate would have been taken over by the government. So...now we're in the process of trying to fix all of this. Get them will's, set up power of attorneys for financial and medical documents, set up DNR documents. It's a process, and one in which my folks seem to be dragging their heels on. They don't want to do this, because it's depressing to them. I understand that....but....if you saw your grandparents screw over my dad, how can you do this to your own ? How in good conscience allow the cycle to continue? Which leads me to me. I'm gathering up my documents now. I'm working on getting them all together so that I can set up my own will for my , to make sure they are taken care of now, instead of waiting. I need to do this so that I can break the cycle. I'll be honest, my financial situation isn't great either, but I still need to do it. Once I do this, things will get better for me and in the process, I want to make sure my folks are taken care of as well for their own security. But since I'm posting this about myself, I wanted to share this experience with all of you who are reading this post. Don't wait until it's too late. Make sure you have all of your documentation set up ahead of time. Get that will made out. Make sure your orders are documented, so if you have a stroke and can't function, people who care about you can follow your orders that are pre-set to prevent people from abusing your estate. In short, get your shit together, before it becomes too late and you cause more harm to your family because you were too lazy or too stubborn to do something about it. Who can you call on to save the day? Why none other than... Agent  |
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Postponement is not a laughing matter. I feel and your family. And the sadness that you must feel watching your parents be in a sort of denial. I am now trying to get copies of my grandmother's will ( she died 40 years ago) due to a new family squabble that I wlll need to address. Nothing at the end is pretty (Virtual Symposium Group) use Virtual Symposium Group
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Im not even sure where to start. Ill come back to this
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Which reminds me, I need to get back to checking my own documents for tonight. Who can you call on to save the day? Why none other than... Agent
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